Well I guess I should start from the beganing...When My daughter Kasey was 13 years old she had very pretty blonde natural hair and blue eyes and she was a cheerleader....Then the mid year of the age 13 she quite cheerleading and asked to dye her hair black...I remeber telling her No then later yes...then she started wearing chains and dark make up and got a lip ring and cutting herself...she hid the cutting from he til she was about 14 and a half...I took her to the doctor he gave her meds and sent her to a therapist. ...as time went on she got worse by the age 15-up she was pure GOTHIC and scary looking too...she was kicked out of 4 schools because of how she dressed and looked. ..now she is 23 with 2 kids...shes calmed down on her goth ways but still has Pitch black hair and dark make up and clothes...but she isnt scary looking anymore...Will she ever change or is this %26quot;Faze%26quot; just who she will always be???Will my daughter ever change her goth ways?? please help?Sorry to disappoint you, but it may just be who she is. I started getting into %26quot;goth%26quot; and piercings when I was about 13 (although, I never cut myself, nor was I ever a trouble maker..I was always an honor roll student). I have naturally blonde hair, and have been dying it black for a long, long time. I%26#039;m 35 now, married, with a baby on the way, and I still wear all black clothing, dark eyeliner, dye my hair black, and still have some piercings. I%26#039;ve tried a few times over the past 22 years to try to start dressing more %26quot;normal%26quot;, with colors other than black, etc. (I even dyed my hair back to my natural blonde at one point-but I hated it and dyed it back after about a month), but I%26#039;ve always felt really depressed when doing that...it felt like I was wearing a costume, and I felt really uncomfortable and sad. This is apparently just who I am. I%26#039;d rather be true to who I am, and be happy and feel good about myself, than to try to %26quot;dress up%26quot; to be considered %26quot;normal%26quot;, and be depressed and awkward feeling. Most of my girlfriends are married, with kids, and they still do the whole %26quot;goth%26quot; thing too. For some kids who get into it, it%26#039;s rebellion, or a way to seek attention, but for others, it%26#039;s just who they are, and the only way they feel comfortable.Will my daughter ever change her goth ways?? please help?well... i think the dark hair and dark clothing is something she is comfortable with and she feels like herself with them. I woudl let go... i mean.. she isnt your baby anymore.. she is a mom herself and as long as she is a good mom and a good person you should be happy. I think maybe when she is 50 she will still prefer dark hair and clothing!
Let go!Will my daughter ever change her goth ways?? please help?1. love your daughter for who she is, not what she looks like
2. it%26#039;s possible that something happened to her when she was 13, something traumatizing that she%26#039;s never told you before.
try talking to her, ask her about it. it doesn%26#039;t hurt to communicate with your daughter, she%26#039;ll love you regardless :)Will my daughter ever change her goth ways?? please help?Um, I don%26#039;t think it%26#039;s a phase if it lasted that long. Considering she%26#039;s above drinking age AND she has two children, I would just forget about her. Assuming she%26#039;s not in your house anymore, you should let her do her own things, she%26#039;s an adult.
Is she a menace to society?
Is she a danger to her children?
Did she kill a man?
If the answer the above questions are all NO, then really, I wouldn%26#039;t worry about it.Will my daughter ever change her goth ways?? please help?If it%26#039;s Gone on for that long, it%26#039;s probably who she is. I%26#039;d say accept it.Will my daughter ever change her goth ways?? please help?I believe that if you were a good parent, you should let your daughter do what she should do. I also believe that you should talk to a professional about this instead of leaving it to a bunch of random people to answer this question. You should also ask your daughter why she did that at the first place because we do not know how your daughter feels.Will my daughter ever change her goth ways?? please help?Other than the cutting, there is absolutely nothing wrong with your daughter. It%26#039;s what she likes. Hell, it%26#039;s what I like. And if it%26#039;s been going on for the past 10 years, I doubt it%26#039;s a %26quot;phase.%26quot; It%26#039;s just who she is now. You need to learn to respect that about your daughter. Sure, she may have taken it overboard when she was younger, but what kid didn%26#039;t? It%26#039;s not even like she just up and left what she was during her early childhood. She%26#039;s probably still the same person. She just found something she%26#039;s more comfortable with. Parents always seem to think that they%26#039;re children should grow up to be what they raised them to be, forgetting that their children can think for themselves and have a will of their own. When a kid isn%26#039;t exactly what a parent expected, the parents are disappointed. They get an idea in their head that who their child is is who the parent wanted them ot be. So when they find out that%26#039;s not really who they are, they feel hurt and lost like they don%26#039;t know they%26#039;re own kid. My mother and step father always saw me as a nice, caring, christian boy who liked to wear polo shirts and khaki pants. Turns out I threw out the christianity at about age 11 because of my own beliefs, only wore those clothes because that was a school dress code (I much prefer my black shorts, Gorgoroth %26#039;Procreating Satan%26#039; T-shirt and hoodie), and I%26#039;m also not exactly the nicest person in the world. But I%26#039;ve always been that way. My parents just had this idea of what they wanted me to be, so that%26#039;s who they thought I was. I%26#039;m 20, and my mom still believes that I am a christian, sending me religious emails constantly. My stepdad by this point has already accepted who I am and just rolls with it, although he doesn%26#039;t like it.
Anyway, what I%26#039;m trying to say here is that your daughter is who she is and you should recognize and respect that. You didn%26#039;t say that she is homeless or unemployed, so it seems to be shes a decently functioning member of society. Just let her be.Will my daughter ever change her goth ways?? please help?It sounds like she is making alot of effort to be loved for who she is as opposed to loved for what people think she is like.Will my daughter ever change her goth ways?? please help?being a former %26quot;goth%26quot; type myself i can honestly say some outgrow it some don%26#039;t. u can try talking to her about it but she%26#039;s still young. mine started @ age 12 and @ 20 yrs old i still have a kind of attraction to the clothes and the looks and OFTEN find myself still wandering into Hot Topic to browse. as she grows older i%26#039;m sure she%26#039;ll grow out of it but it is comfortable for her and it%26#039;s her way of feeling beautiful. when i was in my goth phase it was because it was a mask to hide behind because i was insecure and it was LITERALLY a face i put on every morning to hide how i was feeling. it might be same thing for her. she might jst need to find something to make her feel btr about herself on the inside so she doesn%26#039;t have to hide it by extravagance on the outside. sometimes it is also such a long phase because she cld b afraid of change or if she shows the %26quot;real%26quot; her ppl might not like her. of course u think she%26#039;s perfect but she may not feel that way. try to get her to do something that will boost her self esteem or get her out there with people who aren%26#039;t goth and show her she doesn%26#039;t have to hide behind it. if u choose to talk to her make sure u don%26#039;t say things like i think u shld stop dressing like that or u shld try this or that as it makes it sound like you are accusing her which will only hurt her and make her think u don%26#039;r like her as she is and let her know that u DO love her no matter wat and u know she%26#039;s beautiful and all those motherly things lol and u can also tel her u know she%26#039;s a beautiful girl under all that make-up and goth clothes and ask her to try something a LITTLE more girly for a day and try to VERY gradually get her to transition.
